In a completely unrelated activity today I came across Kathy Sierra's blog. I'm part way through this particular post <a href="http://headrush.typepad.com/creating_passionate_users/2006/04/angrynegative_p.html">http://headrush.typepad.com/creating_passionate_users/2006/04/angrynegative_p.html</a> but I wanted to share it because I feel that it explains my philosophies in a much more educated and non-confrontational way than I would.<br>
<br>The section on mirror neurons explains exactly why I feel so strongly about not dwelling on the group of men who may be sexist. It also explains why many people avoid identifying as feminist (we all know the stereotype) and I think it also explains why many women's groups haven't been successful in creating change - they get bogged down in wanting to hold men accountable instead of discussing solutions.<br>
<br>I feel very strongly that if we want to create change we need to focus on who's doing it right, how they're doing it right, and getting others to do it right (ourselves included). Of course there's value in knowing how something can go wrong, so that you can see those things coming and have a plan on how to head them off, but I think that's secondary once the right way has been established.<br>
<br>The gossip example is interesting, and along the same lines as some things I've seen on the mailing list. One woman (sorry I've forgotten who) says she finds herself being more rude etc in different company. I think this applies mostly in situations where it's an activity we would participate in if it weren't for delayed consequences - in the gossip example it would be realizing how the subject would feel. E.g. I don't enjoy smoking cigarettes. When I'm with a group of smokers I don't find myself smoking for the hell of it. I've certainly had a few drinks too many when with a group though.<br>
<br>I know I'm not innocent (by any means) of being negative, and I also don't believe in ignoring the negative aspects of something - if a design won't work, you can't fix it if you only acknowledge what works - and sometimes clear communication requires being negative, but certainly I have a lot less success at what I'm trying to achieve when I'm angry.<br>
<br>Hope you guys enjoy the read, too.<br>